Wednesday, September 30, 2009

A Space Toddyssey Guide to Less Than Marginally Effective Endurance Athlete Encouragement Vol. 2

More gold has been mined from my less than marginally effective brain along with suggestions from my dear reader.

A Space Toddyssey Guide to Less Than Marginally Effective
Endurance Athlete Encouragement - Vol. 2

  • You're almost there. (This should have been at the top of Vol. 1, but was so obvious I overlooked it.)
  • I am rebooking us on a later flight, do you want window or aisle?
  • Should I just tell the babysitter to spend the night?
  • Remember the "Little Engine That Could!"
  • You're doing great for someone your size.
  • That looks so easy.
  • I am soooo drunk.
  • My legs are tired from standing around, I'll catch you at the finish.
  • Did you see that double amputee? No...wait...she was has ahead of you.* (Something very similar was said by my father to my sister as she was running a half-marathon.)
  • Have you seen Gary? (That one is for MS.)
  • Atta boy! Uh, I mean...girl.(and conversely) Atta girl! Uh, I mean...boy.
  • Lookin' sweaty!
  • What's that smell? Oh, it's you. That's OK, I'm not offended.
*I know there are some double amputees that are very fast and would probably kick my ass - I meant no disrespect. Only to my sister.

3 comments:

Mary said...

OK, I have to tell everyone that I was laughing so hard I actually called T-odd to listen to me laugh at the two previous posts. I was SNORTING!!!

I remember running Grandma's Marathon where you either had the drunk co-ed being a boob or the folks who had been sitting in their fold-out chairs for way too long so board with the race that they didn't even respond when I talked to them or you saw Sven Sunguard http://blogs.citypages.com/gimmenoise/sven.jpg. who T-odd refers to as alligator arms.

LOVE IT!

Molly said...

A spectator at Augusta 70.3 actually got mad at me when I told her it pisses triathletes off to hear "you're almost there!" She was yelling it at mile 1 on the run.

Court said...

Todd, you have found your calling. These are so f-in funny!