Oh Monday - You Can Suck It!

Well, not unlike many other areas of the country, it's snowing again. Enough already. I am supposed to have a rest day and now nature is forcing an unscheduled weight and core workout on me. Bastard.

I am sure you are all wondering, "Assface, what do you do on a Monday such as the day you are currently experiencing?" And to you I respond, "It's MR. Assface to you!"

Seeing as how the dog has been cooped up too much lately, I took him to doggy daycare. This should tire him out so he won't have any energy to chew socks, mittens, LEGOs, Barbies, my Garmin and the endless numbers of dirty Kleenexes my wife is producing.

Yes, my wife is sick. My wife never gets sick so this is somewhat blogworthy. She currently has a bad cold, that I really hope doesn't develop into something worse, like pneumonia, because that could happen with her. (Compromised immune system, which is, strangely the reason she so rarely gets sick - she gets a monthly treatment that gives her IS a recharge.) With her cold comes endless nose blowing and Kleenexes, then the dog hovers around like she is dropping bacon bits from her nose. We have stopped chasing him. He just chews them until the flavor is gone, they are soaking wet and then he shreds them to bits. Stoopid dog. (He is chewer and a shredder. I have to give him credit for not actually "eating" the stuff he destroys. I know because I "check" - dog owners, you know what I'm talking about.)

Later on the docket is ART practitioner #2. #1 didn't seem to know what he was doing. When I reported that it really didn't hurt coach said, "Well, that can't be right" and her ART person concurred. This guy had better know what he's doing!

All right, I better get in the car and on the road since a drive that takes 10 minutes on a normal day will now take an hour in this weather. Stoopid winter.

Wednesday

That title has nothing to do with anything. I just can't come up with any sort of witty title.

There really isn't much happening here. Fall continues to come and go and come and go in the north country. One day cold and rainy - one day sunny and beautiful - three days cloudy, cold and rainy - half a day sunny - etc. - etc. This has been one of the suckiest falls in memory. It will all just make winter seem that much longer. I better figure out something to do to entertain myself (No! Not that way, you dirty birds.) I mean in addition to running and biking on the trainer.

Speaking of running and biking on the trainer - I have started an off-season training program. Monday was my first day. It was stellar! It was also a rest day. Yesterday, was my first real day of training - one hour on the trainer. Oh, I should point out that my daughter was home sick (more about that later) so I had a terrible time finding time to do something I don't really like to do anyway. But I completed it - heart rate in the target range. This morning I ran. Not like that is any news, but I didn't run with "the ladies." I have been encouraged to run with "the guys." So "the ladies" and I are currently separated, for no other reason than they know I want to run faster. This morning's run was good. I could tell I hadn't run since last Thursday and biked yesterday, but it was good. "The guys" were very welcoming and well behaved. Actually, the conversations were considerably tamer than "the ladies" - no talk of vaginas, poop or snot. Not to say "the guy's" conversations were "better," just different (football, bars, news.) But now my back is sore. Like right in the middle. It has to be from the bike. Somewhere along the line here I have to work in some weights and core work. It's a lot to schedule!

It seems like the kids have been trading off sick days from school lately. The crazy thing is their illnesses are the most innocuous illnesses ever. No seasonal flu, no Hini flu, no explosive diarrhea - just a cough, a mild ear infection or a low grade fever with no other symptoms. E has been home four days in the last two weeks with a mild cough and a minor ear infection that is being treated with antibiotics. If I was my mom and E was me, she would be in school, but because we are not those people, she gets to stay home - and it's pure torture. She leaves a trail of destruction behind her wherever she goes so the house is a total disaster. She is a tremendous lallygagger as well. An hour of homework takes her three to complete because she gets distracted and insists on fighting with A and I about getting her work done. It is not this way when she is in the classroom. Arrrgghh! Please, go back to school!

So, there. That's Wednesday. As boring as a Wednesday can be. Carry on!

Hini and the Airplane

In 11 days I will be running a marathon. Over the coming weekend I will be sealed in an aluminum infection cylinder for four hours after which I will be deposited into a tightly packed mass of virus incubating, germ-bags gathered together for a wedding in St. Louis, Mizzura. The wedding is a second wedding for one of A's college friends (it seems strange that it's already time for second weddings.) Now, if I come down with any illness - like H1N1 (a friend in F's class calls it "the Hini flu") I will be seriously irritated. I am not a big fan of air travel anyway (or second weddings for that matter - kidding) and this would absolutely put me over the edge.

Basically, I am right where I should be in my taper - edgy, achy, paranoid and prone to radical mood swings - this could be a very good race.

If I don't get sick.

Saturday is a new day

It is totally clear and sunny out. Still cold, but the sun really helps. I still have that lingering cold. I am on cup five of green tea for the day. I figure this would be better than coffee for helping get over my cold. 

The kids let me have over an hour to ride the trainer. It was nothing spectacular, but I was riding for over an hour, so I will take it right now. The kids didn't complain too much as they were allowed to watch something like their third hour of cartoons. That is what happens when they get up at 6:00 AM. We have to drag them out of bed at 7:00 on a school day - I don't get it. 

F had his final basketball camp. Now, that probably sounds impressive - like my kid is some sort of basketball phenom or is obsessed with basketball. Nothing could be further from the truth. If I may toot my own horn for a moment - I am horrible at ball sports - at least ball sports that require hands. (All together now - insert obvious joke involving "hands" and/or "balls" - "balls" is funny though.) Thus my affinity for individual sports with no balls required (see above parenthetical note.) No, this is a camp put on by community ed, but it is very well run. He went from not being able to get the ball up to the rim to making a good number of shots and his dribbling has improved immensely. I am very impressed. I promised E if she hung out with no complaints we would go out for lunch. After a litany of options, all shot down by F because he is a jerk, they surprisingly and enthusiastically agreed to go to the Turtle Bread Company. 

This is a great little spot in Minneapolis, about a mile from our house. (Of course we drove - please add this to my gigantic carbon footprint.) They serve giant pieces of homemade quiche that the kids love (ie: will eat) and good pastries. It has kind of a funky, down-homey vibe and it is kid friendly. On the way home F says to E, "When I get home I am going to change my clothes and hop on the Wii." E replies, "I thought we were going to cuddle." F said, "Oh, yeah. And then we can play Wii." Priorities kids, priorities.  

We are heading over to my brother-in-laws for dinner tonight. We will bring the dog and see how that interaction goes. E has let me know her feelings about this scenario - "They will all be WILD and I am NOT OK with that." I am, so that's all that really matters.

The house is a disaster area right now. I really need my wife back. (I will pick it all up before she gets home, I was just seeing if anyone was paying attention.)

Can you say "Temptation Island?" We need to get these things delivered soon.

Share a cold...

with your dog. That is what I am doing right now. We were both "sneezey" yesterday and both of us were very "snorey" last night. A was worried about getting a good night's sleep as she was getting our snores in stereo - apparently the dog snores as loud as I do. Impressive! (I actually don't snore as loud or often as I used to, that is how I can tell I have a little bit of a cold.) I think I may have gotten my cold from the dog who has shown quite a knack for getting his tongue in my open mouth - ugh. I also may have gotten it from F, who has been spraying coughs all over the house (followed by me yelling, "Cover!")

The run this morning was good. We tried out race pace for a mile in the middle and it went pretty well. Our training pace is really not that far off. I personally think we are all in better shape than we were last year, just from our ability to chat while we maintain a nice quick little pace. It was kind of a sad run however. We really enjoyed the clear paths and mostly ice-free conditions, but we are going to get 4" - 7" of heavy, blowing snow over the next 24 hours - welcome back to winter. We also really enjoyed running the last 30 minutes or so in daylight. That all comes to a screeching halt as we are plunged back into darkness with Daylight Savings time in a couple of weeks. Three steps forward - two steps back. (Notice my optimism - that is a net of one step forward. It is so unlike me.)

Today's goal: drink as many cups of blueberry breeze green tea as possible and try not to eat ALL the Trefoils. (Some people have said I am cheating for Lent by giving up Oreos specifically, but not all cookies - yeah, well, I am already piloting a rocket ship to hell, so I might as well fuel it with some Girl Scout sinner cookies.)