F: "Now, if I use this finger [pointing to his middle finger] with one or two other fingers, that is OK, right?"
Me: "Yes, that is alright."
F: "But if I use just this finger alone, that isn't alright?"
Me: "Right."
F: "If I use this finger pointing up or down, is that alright?"
Me: "If you use the middle finger to point at something, like I sometimes do, then it is OK. If you are angry and use it - up or down - then that is swearing. If you point at something with your middle finger and say, 'Look at what finger I am pointing with, hee, hee,' that is also considered swearing. If you...you know what - just don't use your middle finger on either hand without one or more of the other fingers to keep it company. You will stay out of trouble that way."
F: "Like this? Or this?" [Showing me a peace sign and three fingers.]
Me: "Yes. And if I hear that you are showing the middle finger again, I will take if from you. I will cut it off because it will show you are not responsible enough to have a middle finger. It's what my dad did to me."
F: [Concerned look on his face] "Really, dad?"
Me: "No, F. Not really."
(I will tape that middle finger to the others if I get another email from his teacher though, F***ing kid!)
3 comments:
Awesome!
I rarely have any interest in reading about people's kids, but stuff like this is gold.
Hank used to point at EVERTHING with his middle finger when he was a toddler. I know we confused and traumatized him when he was attempting to communicate a request and both Gary and I responded with laughter.
I just asked the little girl with the uggs on a horse if I can have them, I am sending them to you! ha ha... not really! BUT isn't it hilarious uggs on an island?? Gotta love it!
Have good weekend... and it is so funny D gets this post and loves it... she really needs a little kid :)
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